New Name

 

If I wanted to give myself a new name

a name with no prior connotations

No acquaintances, nor celebrities, nor notable namesakes

whether awful or saintly, couldn’t be considered,

If I wanted to give myself a new name I would,

but every name is known, somewhere.

 

I chose instead to make up a new name,

untainted by association,

but even those attempts had connotations

of origin, of gender, of decisions of pronunciation.

 

I tried long combinations of syllables,

and single syllables,

but every sound has been made before.

I tried reducing to just the letters of the alphabet,

but Gee sounded American, Elle was French, 

Aye was Scottish, and being called Why would need explaining.

 

So I’m back where I started,

with the name my parents gave me,

before they knew who I was,

only an idea, an association, of who they hoped I would be.

 

Seems it’s up to me

to change the connotations of my moniker,

overcome the compromises committed by other namesakes,

and give this name

something to live up to.